Fight or Flight?

Retaliation or not?

fightWhat would you advise your child if a “friend” was hitting or kicking them when they were out playing, but not hitting or kicking in a “playful” way, if there is such a thing?

Would you advise them to hit the friend back? Walk away? Talk to them?

I’m not sure what the best course of action is in situations like this. My gut feeling is that meeting violence with violence doesn’t solve anything, and is more likely to end up in a full blown fight than anything else. But is that realistic? Does being the bigger person make you seem like the bigger person, or a wimp who is ripe for further violence?

Would walking away stop it, or just put it off for another occasion? What do you tell your children to do?

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3 comments on “Fight or Flight?

  1. Fiona Naughton on said:

    This is such a hard one. My toddler has a horrible habit of hitting me in the face at the moment and I have to hold him by the wrists to stop him. I then tell him that it’s not acceptable to hit anyone in the face or anywhere else ever so I guess I would say to try and walk away or restrain the person if he could. I’d rather the repercussions fell back on the person who did the fighting rather than him retaliating back and getting reprimanded too.

    Fiona @

  2. Sarah on said:

    This is a tricky one – my mum always said when I was younger that if someone’s attacking me I should hit back “10 times harder”, which probably wasn’t the best thing to tell me as if I did retaliate I always got in trouble anyway! I think it’s best to try and ignore it and walk away but in some situations that can be hard!

    Sarah xx

  3. Hi Nic 🙂

    This is going to be contraversial, I know, but I believe that hitting back is the way to go.
    Why? Because I know plenty of adults who experienced bullying at school, and it was generally the ones who retaliated – who showed they could and would stick up for themselves and werent pushovers – who fared best.

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