I have three children. When I look at pictures of them all at the same age (first three months – since that is as far as the third has got so far), they look identical. But that’s about where the similarity ends. Their journeys through the first three months of life were all very different.
My eldest two looked incredibly alike for the first year. I think we hoped our daughter would be like our eldest son in personality too. He was a pretty easy toddler. We didn’t have the terrible twos. He had tantrums at four, but has always been pretty easy. He and our daughter are like chalk and cheese. She’s lovely, funny, a delight to be around, just as he is. But she is not placid. She is not an easy toddler. She is fierce. And she can be incredibly hard work at the moment.
I have to remember that this is normal, this is a phase, this is not aimed at me. But it’s so hard. I’m writing this after what feels like a day long tantrum (hers, not mine). And I don’t know what to do about it.
There’s no reasoning with her; in fact any attempt to reason with her results in more screaming. There’s (usually) no distracting her. It may be possible to bribe her out of a tantrum, but I refuse to go there. So I ignore the tantrum until she is more reasonable, but that can take an awfully long time. I think I am probably blessed that she rarely has tantrums in public (though not never, unfortunately), and she reserves the worst of them for home. I must remember to thank her.
So, really the reason for this post it to ask the wider world what they do with a two year old’s tantrums. How do you cope? What strategies do you use?