Dear So and So …

My first time doing this, so I hope I am not breaking any rules!


Dear Plum

when I have managed to get you off for the nap you so clearly needed, I do not expect you to wake up in less time than it takes to fill the kettle. I had been antipating a nice relaxing coffee and I think it is bad manners of you to interupt this.

Yours, caffeine deprived,



Dear Lollipop Lady

I believe you do a valuable job, I really do. However, I think you’ll find drivers more inclined to stop for you if you wait until you have more than one child waiting to cross the road before stopping traffic. Gathering a few together would be far more efficient, and would prevent you from having to stop every other car at peak time. Oh and while you’re at it, those unaccompanied adults can cross the road for themselves. They really don’t need your assistance to get back to their badly parked car.

Yours, a frustrated parent from another school (which doesn’t have a Lollipop Lady).


Dear Young Man with his trousers belted below his arse cheeks

I am ecsatic that you saw your friend in a car in the lane next to me. However, before going to speak to him, can I ask that in future, you look before you step into the road and do not then decide to stand in the nearside lane, bloking traffic (me!) whilst you talk to the passenger of the car in the lane next to me. It would also be great if you could stop your yappy little dogs from dashing out into the road after you. Please and thank you.

The driver who found out that her horn isn’t working.


Dear So and So...

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5 comments on “Dear So and So …

  1. Funny! And maybe whilst he’s as it he could let us all know why exactly it is necessary to have your trousers hanging from under your bum. It’s cold for Christs sake!

  2. I remember very well looking forward to the break you get at nap time then they don’t sleep.
    Hope you managed to get coffee 🙂

  3. Aren’t you tempted to yank their trousers down (or even up!) – I know I am 😉

  4. Sarah – usually the bottoms are spotty and fat and I have no inclination at all to pull them down – now if it was the levi’s man or some similar pert bum then maybe. Why the owners of such revolting bottoms feel the need to expose their crack is beyond me!!! Anyhow, sounds like said man deserved to be run down 😉

  5. It was my first week with a Dear So and So letter too – yay for us newbies! LOL. I really cant understand the trend for wearing your trousers so low – don’t they live in constant fear of being left waddling like a penguin?! Great post. x

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